Out of the Loop

I am not at the place I should be.


Such a deeper meaning behind those words...for me at this point


The friends I've made....were some of them worth keeping? And what about the bonds I've created? Did they mean nothing then? Do they mean anything now...?


Eh, I guess it just can't be helped sometimes. I feel like the loner. And sometimes I embrace that facet of me too often. You might call it being introvert. 


I'm also beginning to think I'm a damn insomniac now...smhhhhhh..I mean, it was usually 3 for my bedtime at HU, but now that I'm home you'd think my habits of that stupidity would cease, but FUCKKKKK...they haven't :( 


I just am in contemplation mode since I can't fucking sleep and lowkey...I think it has been affecting me in a negative way overall.....eh...when I wake up I'll be excited for Christmas and shit...lmaooooo =) 


...so after rereading this, I conclude that I can flip my own damn frown upside down lmao. Can you give yourself the pat on the back when it's time to? 

Good Morning!

It's 7:21 A.M. as I'm typing this. My body didn't want to fall asleep, it turns out. I'm surprised my eyes aren't bleeding to be honest =/


(sigh) I'm just glad for another day of life, health and strength. And Christmas is right around the corner. Yay. I have no plans for my birthday even though I'll probably be working...but I would always like to do something for my b-day.....on a day off....smh


It's cool tho I'm making money. Dollar dollar bills ya'll :D lol


My mind just suddenly went blank. I can see the sunrise from my window. I think I'll partake in some hot chocolate if this house holds any. I need something to warm me up since it's so freaking cold....


And now my random thought of the morning (as if the other stuff wasn't random already..lol) are you on the pursuit of happiness? Does it only come through material things? Are you longing to cling onto something more, something definition, appeal...something real?


It seems as though the intellectual are sitting back watching the stupid people falter countless times.


However, the intellectual will continuously be on the search for more knowledge.


I don't consider myself better than anyone because we ALL have faults, flaws. We also all have something that sets us apart from the crowd, whether we have discovered it or not.


But whatever you find in life worth fighting for, chase it earnestly and not lustfully. And as the events of my day start to unravel, I hope you find a moment's peace somewhere :)

Love

Love. Some people love it. Some people loathe it. Some people are lucky to find it. Some people wish it never happened to them. Nowadays people can't seem to want to keep it-too obsessed with money, clothes-material things. Lust ensues when the heart grows too fond, just bypassing over the cold feet, the first kiss, the memory of the first dinner-all that mushy stuff. Now it seems like love and lust are as interchangeable as the batteries in my remote control. Once the electric current dies, they must be replaced without hesitation or all chaos will ensue. And the cycle never ends does it? It goes subconsciously insatiate, as people are always looking for that new thrill to keep their sex lives occupied. At least, in most cases, it's not counterproductive. But PAUSE for a moment. Children are a big responsibility that it seems most people are not married-I mean, ready for those responsibilities. But how can this change? The simple answer is it won't anytime soon unfortunately......single ladies turn into single mothers, low down dirty men perfect their low down dirty ways, messing it up for not only the goal-oriented female, but the good dude calculating each move, coming correctly...or missing his opportunity to do so. Yes, this game of love is one of interest. And you better get your shit together before you play. Straight up. 

The Thanksgiving Blog

Happy Thanksgiving Everybody!!!

So...I'd like to begin this blog by saying I am thankful for today, tomorrow and yesterday. Thankful always for the stars in the sky and the sun's warmth at sunrise. It's a beautiful thing when you're with family and they fill you up with the basics (or classics) of turkey, stuffing, macaroni and cheese, cornbread, ham, greens, and the list goes ON AND ON AND ON AND ON! (and on lol) So now that it's about to conclude people focus their attention to Black Friday. OO Black Friday!! Now, I've never actually participated in Black Friday unfortunately, but tomorrow I have a valid opportunity to do so! Ain't that great? And more ungratefully, it's gonna be a mindless gigantic personal splurge once I get my hands on my paycheck lolz....or maybe not? One thing's for sure tho. It's gonna be crazy tomorrow. No doubt!! Ha. So I wish everyone a safe shopping experience!! Don't be reckless-be smart and get there early...right? 

Exiting Scorpio, Entering Sagittarius

Whew!! Scorpioooooooooooooo :D I always love this time of the year. And now it's only getting better with my employment and the holiday season coming up toooo! Ah, life is good. But let's touch upon something serious for a moment.

Gabourey Sidibe.......left me speechless. Her portrayal of an illiterate 16-year-old pregnant twice by her own father captivates audiences nationwide. If you've read the novel Push by Sapphire, you need to see this movie.

Oh my goodness. I need to see this movie again. And again. This movie was so WILD AND LIVE AND every other crazy adjective ever lol. My mind needs a double take from that movie.

Ahhhh so much to recap but I'll do it tomorrow lol.

Recap of Sorts.

As I was raking the leaves today, I noticed that today was noticeably warmer than days past. It's still friggin' cold in the morning tho :-/ I don't even have like a small jacket to throw over a hoodie :( I had a nice reversible Ecko jacket (get on me all u like....fuck u LMAO) that could CLEARLY save me from the cold...gosh...gotta find it. 


So the semester's almost over and I find myself wondering if I'm gonna actually make it back to Hampton. I'll just be an empty promise to those expecting me back, and even though the band is in this f'ed up state of order...yeah. Ok here's what I'm thinking. I would love to go back to Hampton at some point in time. I just don't know when anymore. So I want to at least fulfill my promise to return in the spring. Then maybe I'll come back home. I rly don't know what to do....all I know is I HAVE to stay at school. I cannot (nor will I) just drop out because then things will be 1000000000X harder and I'm already stressed as it is. But I don't buckle under pressure! I pop out diamonds every fucking time :D lmao. 


Oh, and I realize I haven't posted any poetry on here (yet). But I will soooooon! 


Chase your dreams like there's no tomorrow! Remember regret is a little bitch. Beat up that bitch by being YOU! lmaoooo you know what I meeeaaannnn :)


Peace out. For now :) 

Step into Scorpio and the warmth that is November.

Gosh, it's been a while. Well, a lot of things have happened since the last time I wrote something....I saw and LOVED Saw VI lol, I can't wait to see Precious which comes out today, and I passed my freaking midterms! But the fight is not over yet. I still have a LOT of work to do and the semester is like, not even halfway over (idk....) and turkey day is upon us! Whoo! I must say this is my favorite time of year (aside from summer lol) because I feel like November and December have both been good to me over the years :)


So now we're in Scorpio and I think all Scorpios are bangin'. Seriously. :D Then that leads to Sagittarius who I love alsoooooo I have both of them in my house with the exception of my mommy who's a Capricorn like me! :D It matters not though. The whole month of December is wonderful. 


So...I don't rly have anything more to say then END THE VIOLENCE raging through the United States. People are ending other lives for no reason! WTF???!?? Makes the real world so hard to deal with. Gosh. And then there's my school situation.....(SIGH) ok. I need to keep creating these moments of peace and these meetings with friends to keep myself sane when the days in the house get long (and they're about to get longer when the snow comes......the clock's already turned back too.....yay?) Idk (As usual) what the future holds, but I know I'm never alone. So now it's the weekend. Let's get it.


Promote peace around you, Purify the immediate air around you by extending an olive branch of patience, and you will be rewarded. At least, that's how the parable goes :) 


Be good now, 


Ron :)